Hello everyone, this is Biff. Biff works 10 hour days six days a week. He is saving a lot of his money for retirement and that “rainy day” for which we all wait.
Biff currently takes Crestor for high blood pressure, Xanax for anxiety, Adderall for his ADHD and Hydrocodone for his back. To go to sleep, Biff must check all his emails to be sure he has not missed any business or personal emails while he was busy not living his life. He then takes a Seroquel to make sure he can get a good night sleep.
At the age of 63, Biff drops of a massive heart attack, tragically leaving his family mourning such an important loss to their lives.
Oh, and that Retirement and “rainy day” fund Biff worked so hard for becomes a parasite that sucks the life and time out of its benefactors.
After taxing the already taxed assets, a bulk of the money goes to Biff’s employer because he was required to take out an insurance policy for them in order to receive his signing bonus. After that, the insurance companies and hospitals go for a large chunk.
And, in the end, the last big chunk gets buried with you in it, as an entire family eats the remaining small portion in a ceremonial meal to honor your contribution to their lives and hearts.
Now do you see what I mean by, “I feel like I am from another planet”?
Biff is not a REAL person. However, every one of these things has either happened to me or someone close to me.